It's Not Up to Me

I woke up this morning feeling great.  The kids were still sleeping, hubby had left for work, coffee was hot and my Bible was full of promises and joy as I sat with my Lord.  Then I was asked to turn to the book of Nehemiah. All of a sudden my heart became heavy and my eyes felt the warmth of tears.
So much sadness has happened within our old church family.  A month ago friends of ours (they pastor a church now in Montana) lost their beautiful five year old daughter.  My heart cannot grasp the thought of the amount of pain and heartache they face each day.  They trust in God's promises, and know that life for their little girl is much better than any one day she experienced here on earth.  Yet hourly they must rely on God's strength and joy to get them through, as their lives on earth long for the day they will once again see their daughter.
Saturday night brought more tragedy to our church family back home.  A different pastor, his wife and three of their children are now with the Lord as well.  Their situation was different.  One not so gentle.
Pastor Griego was a great man. He always welcomed everyone with a sincere smile and a hug or handshake.  He always made the most uncomfortable feel welcomed.  He worked diligently in the jail system sharing God's love.  He has harvested many street soldiers that are now in God's Army.   One of  the men he shared with, is one of my friends.  He was in jail for murder and many other charges.  He had been in and out of the system since he was a teenager.  He was a gang member.  He was one of the many that society would rather not remember, or release.  But this Pastor took his time, and his Bible and remembered what that life was like for himself.  He knew others deserved a chance at salvation, brought by the one and only Jesus Christ. This waste of a kid who felt more at home in prison that out, was touched.  He gave his life to Christ and is now on fire for the Lord!  I cried the first time I saw my friend out of prison, and in our church! I couldn't believe it! God allowed us to watch him grow in Christ.  He changed and became an amazing man, husband and father who daily seeks the Lord.  My friend would not have stood a chance had this amazingly selfless man, Pastor Griego, didn't taken the time, opportunity or compassion for the inmates in our area.  He lived his life for God and boldly went where He led. I am sure that entering Heaven with his family, hand in hand was icing on the cake for him. Together they were in arms of the Lord.
I had to stop my bible study and pray.  My heart breaks for these families.  BUT GOD can take this and  make good come from it.  Many have come to the Lord because of the family's ability to carry on through God's strength.  Hearts have been touched and lives will be changed, because nothing is impossible for God.  Nothing is too big for Him.  He still sits on the throne, and "we have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure".

Isaiah 40:29-31

He gives strength to the weary 

and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary, 

and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the LORD

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary, 

they will walk and not be faint.

God reminded me that it is not up to me who is saved.  It is not who I think is worthy of salvation, for Jesus came to save the world. If it were up to anyone else, I myself would perish.
I am merely a vessel.  My life I have given to Christ.  As I walk through this world, I am to do God's work. I am to "put my life on the line and my faith in God" (Skip Heitzig).  I am to speak God's word boldly.