Social Worker for Christ

When I was younger, I wanted to help people. I wanted to be in social work or something of the sort.  I had an opportunity to intern at Child Protective Services while studying to be a social worker.  I loved it!  At first.  I worked in investigations and the things I saw, heard, and dealt with battered my heart, as much as the wounded babies (of all ages) I dealt with on a weekly basis.  I quit after about three and a half years.  I learned I was not strong enough to handle such things.
I should mention that this was also at a time in my life where I held God at arm's length.  I was angry and bitter, for the situation I was in, failing to see, that it was my decisions I made without Him that got me into the messes in the first place.  I didn't have God's strength, wisdom, power and grace to handle what I was dealing with on a daily basis, much less what I faced at work.
I put social work behind me.  I quit school to try and figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I have said many times, "you couldn't pay me enough to do that again"!
So, since then, I have submitted and re-committed my life to Christ.  I returned to school and have my degree in "Digital Imaging" and have started my own business in design and photography.  No social work.  Or so I thought.
When we walked into church on Sunday, I was introduced to a couple of ladies that were asking for prayer for a group of teenage girls they minister to at juvenile facility.  I filled out a prayer slip, committing to pray for these girls and this group of ladies that minister to them.  That is when I felt the tug.  My heart strings were being pulled by my Lord, whom might I remind you, I re-committed and submitted my life to.   I asked for the information, should I want to join this ministry, and told them I would pray about it.  I have been in tears every day since.  I know that this is what God wants me to do.  I know that He has given me a heart to care for the broken.  I also know that my own heart has been broken in doing this.  I pulled up my big girl panties and said, ok.  I will do it.  
Today I had BSF (Bible Study Fellowship), where I am blessed with an in depth study of God's word (in the book of Acts this year), and amazing ladies who share the same passion for Christ.  I shared with my discussion group about my new found adventure and also of my apprehension.  The ladies prayed before we left class, and as we were dismissing to lecture, a friend told me, "Mackenzie, as she was praying, I just felt led to tell you, that even as Paul was drug from the city and stoned, God will heal your heart and give you great courage to do great things for him as you step back into this."  Again, tears.
I do not know how to explain what my heart felt at that moment!  He knew exactly how much I was struggling with facing these horrible things again, in ministering to these young ladies.  He knows my heart is broken and how much I FELT for those babies that He put in my path years ago.  Relief, joy, gratefulness, hope. All things I felt at that moment.  Along with His arms around me, lifting me up and encouraging me to go and do great things in His name!  
I am no longer armed with empty words and broken laws!  I have a sword: God's true, living, breathing word.  A belt of truth, a shield of faithfulness, a breastplate of righteousness, and a helmet of salvation, through the Only One who did away with old laws, and gives grace!  How amazing He is!  To give me what my heart desires, yet in a way I never thought possible! I am not a social worker for a government agency.  I do not gain a paycheck.  I am a social worker for Christ and His army!